How Relational Ethics Fits in Path Two

DC 2025 How Relational Ethics Fits in Path Two

This lesson explores Bill Doherty’s ethical framework regarding path two (separation or divorce) in discernment counseling. It emphasizes the importance of deep reflection, ethical considerations, and the exploration of repair possibilities before deciding to end a marriage.

DC Handout - Complete Guide to Path Two

Key Points:

Ethical Starting Point:

Individuals who have made a lifetime commitment to each other owe their spouse a full and deep reflection on the reasons for ending the marriage.
This reflection should include an examination of how the marriage could be repaired and an invitation to the spouse to participate in that process.

Goals of Discernment Counseling:

Clarity and confidence about a direction for the relationship based on a deeper understanding of what has happened to the marriage and each person's contributions to the problems.
The ethical part involves considering the lifetime promise made in marriage and the responsibility to exhaust alternatives before turning to divorce.

Ethical Responsibilities:

Advanced Notice: Partners owe each other advanced notice that the marriage is in trouble, not waiting until a decision is made and the other person cannot respond.
Reflection and Repair: Partners should reflect on what has happened beyond their own narrative and attempt to repair the marriage.
Exhausting Alternatives: Partners should have explored and invited their spouse into a repair process before considering divorce.

Scenarios for Path Two:

Reluctant Divorce: The leaning-in partner has tried therapy, invited the spouse to therapy, and taken a deep look at the problems but finds that the spouse is unwilling to try to restore the marriage.
Lack of Motivation: Some individuals may lack the motivation or energy to attempt repair, and while therapists should respect their autonomy, they should also encourage a thorough exploration of the ethical dilemma.

Therapist's Role:

Elicit Ethical Dilemma: Therapists should help clients recognize and engage with the ethical dilemma inherent in ending a marriage, encouraging them to pay attention to the ethical commitment made in marriage.
Encourage Reflection: Therapists should encourage clients to see if they have exhausted the possibilities for repair and reconciliation before making a decision about path two.

Conclusion:

Bill Doherty's ethical framework around path two involves encouraging deep reflection, exploring repair possibilities, and recognizing the ethical responsibilities inherent in ending a marriage. By eliciting the ethical dilemma and encouraging clients to exhaust alternatives, therapists can support couples in making informed and ethical decisions about their relationship's future.

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