Session Four Skill 5 LO Shifting from Reasons for Path Two to the Possibility of Path Three

DC 2025 Session Four Skill 5 LO Shifting from Reasons for Path Two to the Possibility of Path Three

In discernment counseling, it’s crucial to shift the leaning-out partner’s focus from their divorce narrative to the possibility of path three (couples therapy). This involves gently challenging their reasons for divorce and exploring their reservations about moving forward with it.

Key Points:

Divorce Narrative:

By the time the leaning-out partner enters discernment counseling, they have developed a divorce narrative with reasons for and objections to divorce.
This narrative often leads to a sense of hopelessness and momentum towards path two (divorce).

Pivot Technique:

Use a pivot to shift the conversation from the client's reasons for divorce to the possibility of path three.
Gently raise the option of path three and see where the client goes with it.

Exploring Reservations:

Encourage the leaning-out partner to explore their own reservations about moving forward with divorce.
Help them identify the factors that are holding them back from taking that step.

Financial Concerns:

Address financial concerns that may be contributing to the leaning-out partner's hesitation about divorce.
Explore the financial implications of divorce and the potential challenges they may face.

Emotional and Practical Considerations:

Discuss the emotional and practical considerations of divorce, such as the impact on children and the reaction of the leaning-in partner.
Help the leaning-out partner consider the potential consequences of divorce and the importance of handling it in a way that minimizes harm.

Running Out of Time:

Acknowledge that the leaning-out partner may be running out of patience or time for the current situation.
Encourage them to consider path three as an alternative to divorce, focusing on the potential for personal growth and relationship improvement.

Conclusion:

Shifting the leaning-out partner's focus from their divorce narrative to the possibility of path three involves gently challenging their reasons for divorce and exploring their reservations about moving forward with it. By using the pivot technique and addressing financial, emotional, and practical considerations, therapists can help clients consider the potential benefits of couples therapy and the importance of handling divorce in a way that minimizes harm.

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