Helping the leaning-in partner self-regulate and avoid behaviors that make things worse is a critical skill in discernment counseling. This involves guiding them to neither pursue nor distance from their spouse, ensuring they remain present and available without exerting excessive pressure or withdrawing.
Key Points:
Avoiding Pursuing or Distancing:
Being Present and Available:
Normalizing Mistakes:
Addressing Specific Behaviors:
Supporting Their Goal:
Building a Repertoire of Skills:
Conclusion:
Helping the leaning-in partner self-regulate and avoid making things worse involves encouraging them to neither pursue nor distance, be present and available, normalizing mistakes, addressing specific behaviors, supporting their goal, and building a repertoire of skills. By guiding the leaning-in partner through these steps, discernment counselors can support them in creating a more constructive environment for their spouse to discern their path forward, ultimately fostering a more productive discernment process.