Moving Existing Couples Therapy Case to Discernment Counseling – How to Switch

DC 2025 Moving Existing Couples Therapy Case to Discernment Counseling – How to Switch

Discernment counseling can be a valuable tool in ongoing couples therapy when one partner becomes ambivalent about staying in the marriage and continuing therapy. This approach helps address ambivalence and decides whether to recommit to the relationship or explore other options.

Key Points:

Identifying Ambivalence:

Recognize when a couple in ongoing therapy reaches a point where one partner is ambivalent about staying in the marriage and continuing therapy.
This ambivalence can arise from feeling stuck, discovering an affair, or facing a crisis during therapy.

Dual Ambivalence:

Understand that dual ambivalence occurs when one partner is unsure about continuing the marriage and therapy, while the other partner wants to continue and work hard on the relationship.
Understand that dual ambivalence occurs when one partner is unsure about continuing the marriage and therapy, while the other partner wants to continue and work hard on the relationship.

Proposing Discernment Counseling:

Instead of continuing with the current therapy model, propose backing up and doing discernment work.
Instead of continuing with the current therapy model, propose backing up and doing discernment work.

Benefits of Discernment Counseling:

Discernment counseling helps hold the leaning-in partner steady while supporting the leaning-out partner in deciding whether to recommit to the relationship.
It provides a structured process for exploring options and making informed decisions about the future of the marriage.

Managing Energy Levels:

Recognize that continuing therapy with a partner who is ambivalent can lead to increased discouragement, criticism, and fighting at home.
Discernment counseling offers a way to address these issues and improve energy levels and engagement in the therapeutic process.

Conclusion:

Applying discernment counseling in ongoing couples therapy involves recognizing dual ambivalence, proposing discernment work, and highlighting its benefits in treating ambivalence and supporting decision-making. By using discernment counseling as a tool in your therapeutic toolbox, you can help couples navigate uncertainty and make informed decisions about their relationship's future.

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